Make Me Anew
by WhoNeedsNormality
Summary: After Marzia is killed in a car crash, Felix goes into depression. He stops making videos and feels lost without the girl he loved. Can his best friend Cry pick up the pieces and make Felix anew? May contain PewDieCry later on.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: OK, first, for those of you who were following my last story "Nothing Standing in Our Way", sorry for not updating lately. I know a small number of people were reading that, but it's still a number of people, and I hate disappointing anybody. So I swear, eventually, I WILL update that story. I just kinda lost inspiration for it. But as soon as I get my muse back for that story, I will update it. For now, enjoy this new story I've made. Like it says in the description, it may or may not contain PewDieCry later, depending on how me and other people feel. So with that, enjoy!**

Felix Kjellberg, otherwise known as PewDiePie, the most famous person on YouTube, lay alone in his bed, tears in his eyes. You'd think he'd be laying next to his girlfriend Marzia, since they lived together, but that was no longer to be.

Felix still remembered the day he'd found out. He'd just gotten back from Gamestop with a new game he'd been super excited to play, and was getting ready to film the first part of it for his bros, but then, his phone had rang.

It was the hospital.

They told him there had been an accident. A man was on his cell phone and hadn't been paying attention to the road, so he didn't realize he had been barrelling straight toward Marzia's car, until it was too late. She'd tried to swerve out of the way, but she couldn't get out of the path of the other car. The two cars collided, as helpless passerby looked on.

Both cars were totaled. The man, the reckless driver who'd caused the accident, made it out with a broken arm and several cuts on his back, which were easily stitched up.

Marzia wasn't that lucky. She wasn't lucky at all.

Felix had driven straight to the hospital the minute he'd heard. He'd ran into the building and asked, out of breath, what room she was in. He had burst into the room and saw her laying there, barely breathing, clinging onto life. He'd sat down next to her bed and gently took her hand, begging for her to wake up.

She'd opened her eyes and weakly smiled when she saw her boyfriend. Through his tears, he managed to whisper, "Are you...are you okay?"

She had only clenched his hand tighter, as a teardrop escaped her eye. She couldn't answer him, not only because she was barely able to speak, but also because she knew the answer, and she couldn't tell him.

Felix had seen it in her eyes. She was giving up, already slipping away. He couldn't keep his sobs silent anymore, and cried aloud.

"Don't cry..." she'd managed to whisper, looking at him with a pleading look in her eyes.

"Marzia..." he'd choked out, "I love you...I'm so sorry..."

She'd clenched his hand even tighter. "It's...not your fault," she'd mumbled. Her breathing had grown quicker and lighter, her heartbeat had slowed.

The last thing she'd managed to say was, "I'll miss you PewDiePie." Then, the monitor had stopped beeping. She was gone.

Felix had burst into tears, grabbing her hand harder than ever. He'd kissed her one last time, and then stood up, and called the nurse.

After he'd gotten home, he'd logged into Marzia's YouTube channel, and closed it. She'd always said that if anything happened to her, she wanted Felix to close her channel, and she'd open it again once she was able to. But Felix knew that that channel would never be open again.

He felt...broken inside. When she had left, she had taken a part of him, a part that could never be replaced. He definitely didn't feel like making videos, so he made a quick vlog, saying that he was gonna take a break for a few weeks, because a close friend of his was going through some problems. He couldn't bear to tell his bros what had happened to Marzia. He didn't want them to feel sorry for him, he couldn't take that.

Several of his bros were smart, though, and knew his hiatus had something to do with Marzia, since her channel had been closed and she hadn't said anything beforehand. In his vlog, Felix had said that Marzia couldn't handle her channel at the moment and needed to take a break for awhile, and couldn't tell them because she was busy. But he knew he hadn't sounded very convincing, as he'd teared up a few times in the vlog. It had taken countless tries to film it without breaking down completely, but Felix really didn't want his bros to worry.

After all that was taken care of, Felix had shut down completely. He couldn't eat, he couldn't sleep, he definitely couldn't play video games, or talk to his friends. He just lay there, depressed, lonely, empty. His friends had tried to help, but nothing could pick him up. The Swedish gamer was usually so happy and energetic, but he'd lost a part of him, something he'd never get back.

He'd moved out of the house he and Marzia had shared, as it held too many memories. He'd moved to Florida, in the U.S., so he could be closer to his friend Cry. He'd figured that's where he should go since Cry was his closest friend and he'd always wanted to live near him. Despite the fact he lived closer to Cry now and could actually visit him without having to take a plane, he still felt broken over Marzia.

Despite the fact that Felix and Marzia had often argued, and she always said that he spent more time playing games than he did with her, he'd still loved her completely, and felt like he couldn't live without her. Whenever they'd spent time apart, he'd felt like part of him was missing. Whenever they'd touched, or talked, he had felt sky high.

Marzia brought out the best in Felix, and without her, he couldn't go on. He had even thought about suicide, for a split second, but he knew that he couldn't do that. He cared too much about his friends, and his bros, to do that. He had to stay strong, for them.

And that's why he lay awake in bed, lonely and depressed, wishing he could hold her, or kiss her, or even speak to her one last time. But he couldn't. She was gone, and he'd never see her again. A tear escaped his eye. It'd been three weeks since it happened, but Felix was still in shutdown mode. He just barely ate enough to stay alive, and he looked like a wreck. He never left his house unless he had to.

Suddenly, Felix had an urge. An urge to be with someone. To lay beside another human being, to feel less alone. He grabbed his cellphone, which read 1:15 AM, and called one of his closest friends Cryaotic, or just Cry for short. He needed to be with his friend. He didn't want to talk, just to be held, and comforted, even if it was just in a friendly way.

The phone rang a few times before Cry picked up. "Hello?" he mumbled. He yawned, obviously having just woken up to the sound of the phone ringing, and Felix cringed. He felt bad for waking up his friend, but he needed comfort, he needed it. "Hey, Cry, it's Felix," he croaked out. He hadn't spoken to anyone for quite a while.

Cry's voice immediately changed to concerned. "Oh, hey, what's wrong?" he asked. He knew about the accident and knew how broken up Felix was about it.

His Swedish friend replied, "C-Could I come over? Maybe? I know it's late, but...I just...I..." he trailed off, tears welling up in his eyes again. "I guess I just...need a friend."

Cry nodded understandingly, even though Felix couldn't see it. "I understand, friend. Sure you can come over." He spoke with a warm, comforting tone, exactly what Felix needed to hear.

"Thanks," his friend replied, and sighed once he got off the phone. He got up and brushed his hair, and changed into some clothes, so he didn't look like a mess. He drove over to Cry's house, which took about half an hour. He knocked and Cry opened the door. Felix couldn't take it anymore, he fell into his friend's arms, sobbing. Cry didn't say anything, just held him and patted him on the back, whispering comfortingly, "It's okay."

Felix choked out, "She's gone. I can't believe it. It's been three weeks but I still feel so empty without her! She was everything...I loved her so much...but she's gone...she's never coming back..." and he burst into tears again. He clutched his friend as tightly as he could, as Cry just continued to hold him and tell him it was going to be okay.

When he finally couldn't cry anymore, Felix pulled out of his friend's arms and straightened up, wiping his eyes dry. "T-thanks..." he whispered to Cry, who nodded in understanding. There was an awkward silence, and then Cry asked, "So...is there something you wanna do...to take your mind off, you know..." he never said "the accident", he just referred to it as "you know", for fear of reminding Felix of what he'd lost.

Felix shook his head sadly. "Not really."

Cry persisted gently. "Sure you don't wanna play a game, or..."

Felix shook his head again. "No. I can't play video games. It just...I can't." Despite the fact that Felix normally played games alone, he'd sometimes played with Marzia, and playing any game was too painful for him at the moment. He hoped that'd go away soon, because he still loved playing games, and he still had faith that he'd go back to making videos again.

Cry then got an idea. "Wanna watch a movie?" he asked. "Something funny. A-a comedy?" he smiled hopefully, and miraculously, Felix smiled back. It was a small smile, but still, it was progress. "Alright, I guess," he said, and they sat down on Cry's couch as Cry took out his laptop and selected a movie on his hard drive. Neither of them paid attention to the name of it, but it was a pretty funny movie. Half an hour in, Felix had even laughed a little, and he looked a lot happier than he had when he first came over.

By the time the movie was over, it was 3:30 AM. "Shit, it's late," Felix muttered. Cry only smiled. "Heh, it's fine, I stay up a lot later most nights. I actually don't fall asleep that early most of the time, tonight was a rare occurence." They both chuckled a bit.

"So..." Felix started, "Guess I'll go home now."

Cry stopped him. "Hey, you don't have to leave. I know it's late and you might not feel like driving. Wanna sleep in the guest room for tonight, and go home tomorrow? Who knows, maybe you might feel up to playing a game, and you can spend the day here," he suggested hopefully.

Felix smiled. "You sure?" Cry nodded. "It's no trouble, friend. What are guest rooms for?"

The Swedish man got up and stretched. "Alright then, guest room it is. What do ya know, Cry, we're having a sleepover, just like ten year old girls!" he exclaimed, with a bit of the old PewDiePie enthusiasm in his voice.

Cry grimaced. "Please don't compare me to a ten year old girl." They both chuckled, and headed off to bed. Felix still felt a bit empty without Marzia, but being around Cry had lightened him up a bit, and he felt a lot happier than before. But before he went to sleep, he still wished a silent goodnight to Marzia.

**A/N: And there we go! Sorry if this was a little long winded, hope it wasn't boring. Hopefully it'll become more exciting later, and I'll try to make the chapters a little shorter. This isn't a oneshot, it'll have a few more chaps at least. I feel like my writing is getting better! Hope you guys enjoyed!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Yeah I know, I still haven't updated "Nothing Standing in Our Way". I...might not continue that one, I just don't have the inspiration for it. It was hard even updating this. Honestly, though I love to write, it's not my passion, not something I'll keep doing through the years. So sorry but that story's on hiatus, I think...someday I might continue it, who knows...or maybe write an even better one. Honestly, "Nothing Standing in Our Way" has a pretty boring, overused highschool AU plot. I wanna come up with something more original. So yeah, with that, enjoy chapter 2 of this story.**

Felix awoke to the smell of pancakes...his favorite breakfast food. Interest rose him out of bed. He was a bit shocked, this was the first time he'd willingly gotten out of bed in weeks. He stumbled drowsily to the kitchen, and smiled, seeing his pal Cry already wide awake, and fixing breakfast. Felix suddenly got an idea, and smirked.

The Swede crept up behind his oblivious friend and then wrapped an arm around him, and said a bit too loudly and cheerfully, "Hey, thanks for making breakfast, honey!" Cry literally jumped into the air and screamed. He collapsed on the floor, unhurt but shaken up. His friend couldn't contain his laughter, and he fell over too. Cry scowled at Felix but then started laughing along with him, it was just too funny.

Eventually Cry got up to flip over the pancakes again. "Ok, Pewds, you had your fun, now sit down and wait for breakfast", he chuckled.

Felix smirked but sat down at the table. "Ah, alright, don't worry about it Cry."

Cry smiled at the familiar phrase. Pewds used it on him whenever possible.

"But seriously though, I didn't know you cooked", the Swede mused.

This time Cry smirked, though Felix couldn't see through his mask. Felix knew what he looked like, but Cry still felt better wearing the mask, it just felt more natural. "There's a lot of things you don't know about me", he said jokingly to his friend. He brought over a plate with a stack of steaming pancakes, covered with syrup. Felix licked his lips in anticipation, and Cry chuckled at how childlike his friend was behaving.

"These look so freaking good!" Pewds yelled enthusiastically. "I haven't had pancakes ever since..." he trailed off. Marzia had been the last one to make pancakes for him. He blocked the memory out, he was feeling better this morning, and didn't want to ruin it. "...a while", he finished. Cry knew something was up but decided not to mention it. He sat down with Felix and they both chowed down on their breakfast.

Cry took off his mask to eat, and Felix glanced at his face for a moment. Ever since he'd first seen it, he seldom asked to see it again, just because he felt that Cry should have some privacy. But whenever he could, the Swede liked to get a glance at his friend's face. He looked away quickly, making sure Cry hadn't seen him. But Cry still did. He chuckled. "Sure, get a good look, friend, I don't mind", he said, and Felix blushed lightly. "Whatever bro", he replied.

"So..." Cry mumbled. "You sure are feeling better this morning."

Felix smiled. "Yeah I am. I guess, finally waking up in a house with someone else again, you know? Plus, I think that movie put me in a good mood."

Cry replied, "You liked that movie?"

Felix shrugged. "Eh, it was okay. Pretty weak ending, but overall, really funny!" Cry nodded, a bit absentmindedly.

"You know Pewds, you're starting to sound like a movie critic. Remember, you're a gamer!" he mused. His friend smiled a bit. "Hey Cry, speaking of gaming..." he started, and Cry smiled, immediately knowing where this was going.

"...I think I'm in the mood to play some video games today."

**A/N: Well I'm pretty proud of this chapter. You guys like it? Hope so!**


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